I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
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