This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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