i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Randomize