Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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