If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
