I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Randomize
