it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize