I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
