I hope mine doesn't look like that
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
It's blow job season.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
