You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
