Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Randomize