Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
and you fell through a lawn chair
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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