I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
