how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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