addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
