ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
