i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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