Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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