I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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