Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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