He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
