Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
