it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
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