But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
