my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
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