Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize