She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
we should paint friendship bongs
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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