I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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