ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
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