Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
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