1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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