I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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