I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
