I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
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