Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
she smelled like a LAN party
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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