We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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