You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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