stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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