well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
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