Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
True strength comes from lack of pants
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
