just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize