i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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