This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I can't put those talents on a resume
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
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