I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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