Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
