Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
