I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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