Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
