New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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