Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize