i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize