seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
