turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
