You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize