My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
